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Jennifer Brum Counselling

Healing from Trauma, Anxiety, Depression & Grief

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Trauma Recovery

Why Pink Should Be Your Colour On February 22, 2017

February 10, 2017 by Jennifer Brum

With Pink Shirt Day just around the corner I felt it was an opportune time to reflect on the importance of education around bullying. Sadly, no one is exempt from the experience of bullying. It’s something we can all relate to in one way or another. Whether your experience has been as the victim, the perpetrator, or the witness it can have long term physical and psychological consequences.

By definition, bullying is the repeated use of force, threat or coercion to abuse, intimidate or embarrass others with the intent to harm. Bullying can happen to anyone at any age and may be in person or, in this day and age, through cyberbullying.

Up to 25% of students report having been bullied at some point in their lives – some with very severe outcomes. The devastating effects of bullying include physical and emotion pain, humiliation, embarrassment, and shame. Without support the individual may resort to social isolation, low self-esteem, depression, anxiety, and PTSD. They also may struggle with anger, aggression or hostility. Bullying can even lead to suicidal ideation, suicide, or violent behavior.

The added stress and anxiety caused by bullying and harassment obviously adds to the challenge of learning. Students have difficulty concentrating, a decreased ability to focus and they can’t seem to remember things that they’ve learned. So not only are they maladjusted on a social and emotional level, they may also struggle academically as well.

Often the bystanders are also hurt as they witness bullying. They may be in fear of being the next victim and leave feeling guilty or shameful for not stepping in. Or, they may avoid getting involved because they just aren’t sure what to do. In some cases witnesses may feel like they will only make it worse for the individual being bullied if they try to help. Talk to your kids about what they can do to stay safe and help others.

There are signals to be aware of that can alert parents to a potential bullying situation. Be curious if you notice your child has withdrawn from family and school activities, wants to be left alone, or has an unusual amount of shyness. He or she may claim to suffer with stomachaches and/or headaches, and possibly has panic attacks. They may not be able to sleep, sleep too much, seem exhausted, or suffer with nightmares. There is also potential for substance abuse as it provides an escape from their painful experiences.

It is incredibly important for adults/parents to set a good example and be a good role model. Research has shown that children who get away with violence and aggression continue to do so in adulthood. There will be a higher chance of dating aggression, sexual harassment, gangs, drugs, and other criminal behavior later in life. Take the time to talk about consequences and taking responsibility for your own actions. Be curious about why someone chooses to bully others and offer support. There’s always a reason behind the behavior and often it’s a call out for love.

Starting at a young age we must teach and model empathy, compassion, kindness, acceptance and understanding. Let children know that there will be no tolerance for bullying and why it’s so important to treat one another as you would like to be treated.

Each of us deserve to feel safe in the world. If you are being bullied, know of someone who is, or you are a bully yourself, there are resources to help. Contact me to schedule counselling sessions or find support using one of the resources listed below.

Phone
Kids Help Phone
1-800-668-6868

Text
I Am Someone
Text 211

Chat
Youth in BC

Wishing you a gentle journey,

Jennifer Brum

Filed Under: PTSD - Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, Trauma Recovery Tagged With: bullying, children, PTSD

How to Use Your Sensory Skills to “Self-Rescue”

January 27, 2017 by Jennifer Brum

While experiencing a traumatic incident our nervous system responds with a fight, flight or freeze mode.  If this trauma response is interrupted and unable to complete it becomes the “go to” response when triggers arise in the future.

Common unresolved trauma symptoms include frightening thoughts, flashbacks, feeling tense or on edge, having negative thoughts about oneself or the world and distorted thoughts like guilt or blame. These symptoms can be extremely debilitating. The nervous system reverts back to that unresolved trauma response even if they are safe in the present time.  It’s helpful to have a few tricks up your sleeve to bring some balance and stability back into the here-and-now.

Grounding techniques have proven useful in building the capacity to “self-rescue”. It is based on the assumption that if one is able to break his or her absorbed internal attention on the traumatic images, thoughts and feelings by instead focusing on and connecting with their current external surroundings through their senses (here-and-now), the accompanying fight/flight arousal will diminish.

The sensory grounding technique below will assist him or her in understanding that they are perfectly safe in their present context. It also demonstrates the value of using their sensory skills (sight, touch, smell, hearing, and even taste) to ground them to this safety in the present empirical reality.

3-2-1 Sensory Grounding Technique

  1. Describe, out loud if possible, 3 objects that you can see in the room that are above eye level.  These must be physical, not imaginal, objects.
  2. Identify, out loud if possible, 3 “real world” sounds that you can currently hear sitting in the room (the sound can be beyond the room).
  3. Pick up an item, really feel it, and describe out loud if possible, the texture of this object. Repeat this with 2 additional objects.
  4. Return to objects that you can see and now identify 2 above eye level. Do the same with 2 things you can hear and 2 things you can feel.
  5. Repeat this now with 1 object each for sight, sound, and texture.
  6. Now consider what happened to the negative feelings, thoughts, and images associated with the traumatic material from before the exercise.  How do you feel?  Have they lessened or disappeared?

I hope you find this technique helpful! If you would like to make an appointment to further discuss techniques to combat trauma symptoms please contact me at www.jenniferbrumcounselling.com. I would be honored to meet with you.

Wishing you a gentle journey,

Jennifer Brum

Technique courtesy of Eric Gentry

Filed Under: PTSD - Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, Techniques, Trauma Recovery, Triggers Tagged With: cope, grounding, PTSD, recovery, technique, trauma, trigger

PTSD: What You Need To Know

January 13, 2017 by Jennifer Brum

WHAT DOES PTSD STAND FOR?

PTSD is an acronym for Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD). Increasingly in the media, PTSD is gaining more attention and rightfully so. PTSD is a disorder that can affect anyone – male, female, young, and elderly. In fact, about 10% of Canadians struggle with PTSD at any given time. You may be wondering…what is it anyway? Who does it affect and what are the symptoms? Is it only veterans who end up with PTSD or can anyone “get it”? Read on for a few fast facts about PTSD…

WHAT CAUSES PTSD?

  • Any threat to your safety or even an event that appeared to have been a threat to your safety
  • Any event that overwhelms you with feelings of hopelessness and helplessness especially if it feels unpredictable an uncontrollable.
  • An imminent threat where some form of defensive response is necessary
  • A frightening, shocking, or dangerous event
  • Events such as:
    • Car accidents
    • Serious injury
    • Actual or threatened death of your life or others’ lives
    • Bullying
    • Sexual violation
    • Medical procedures
    • After combat, assault or disaster (PTSD affects nearly 1 in 10 Canadian veterans who served in Afghanistan)

Not everyone who has these experiences end up being diagnosed with PTSD. However, about 8 million adults have PTSD during a given year. Approximately 10% of women develop PTSD in their lives compared to about 4% of men. Some people may have PTSD but don’t realize that’s what it is that they are struggling with.

WHAT ARE THE SYMPTOMS?

Following a particularly traumatic event we often exhibit physical symptoms immediately. But the effects in our brains actually take some time to form. That’s why symptoms of PTSD — reliving an event, nightmares, and anxiety — don’t show up until some time later. These may include:

  • Severe emotional distress or physical reactions to something that reminds you of the event
  • Avoidance:
    • avoiding thinking or talking about the event
    • avoiding people, places or activities that remind you of the traumatic experience
    • avoiding feelings or thoughts related to the event
  • Difficulty maintaining close relationships
  • Flashbacks, or reliving the event, potentially paired with racing heart and sweating
  • Recurrent, unwanted distressing memories of the traumatic event
  • Trouble sleeping and/or nightmares
  • Frightening thoughts
  • Increased arousal including feeling tense or on edge, having trouble sleeping, angry outbursts, irritability, aggressive behaviour, and being easily startled or frightened
  • Negative changes in thinking and mood such as:
    • Negative feelings about yourself or others
    • Inability to experience positive emotions
    • Feeling emotionally numb
    • Lack of interest in activities you once enjoyed
    • Hopelessness about the future
  • Memory problems, including not remembering important aspects of the traumatic event
  • Always on guard for danger
  • Overwhelming guilt or shame
  • Self-destructive behaviour, such as drinking too much or driving fast
  • Trouble concentrating

WHY ARE SOME PEOPLE EFFECTED WHILE OTHERS ARE NOT?

A group of people may experience the same event but they won’t necessarily all end up with PTSD. There are a number of factors that can effect the chances of PTSD including:

  • A complex mix of inherited mental health risks, such as increased anxiety or depression
  • Life experiences including the amount and severity of trauma you’ve gone through since childhood
  • Your temperament
  • The way your body regulates the chemicals and hormones your body releases in response to stress

WHAT SHOULD I DO IF I THINK I MIGHT HAVE PTSD?

Post-traumatic stress disorder can be a debilitating condition. If you have experienced or witnessed a traumatic event you may also be experiencing some of the symptoms listed above. If the symptoms don’t go away over time and are disrupting your life you may have PTSD. If this is the case, early treatment is better. Talk to your family doctor and a therapist who specializes in trauma treatment. Confide in a close friend or family member and do your best not to isolate yourself.

There are also ways to alleviate PTSD triggers such as mindfulness techniques, connecting with resources who understand what you are going through and are able to support you in your recovery, and using grounding techniques. If you would like to meet with me to work through your unresolved trauma. I would welcome the opportunity.

If you think you are in danger of hurting yourself or someone else call 911 immediately. There is help available, you don’t have to go through this on your own.

Wishing you a gentle journey,

Jennifer Brum

Filed Under: PTSD - Post Traumatic Stress Disorder, Trauma Recovery Tagged With: PTSD

7 Tips for Trauma Recovery

November 4, 2016 by Jennifer Brum

Experiencing or witnessing a traumatic event can leave you feeling as if your life is spiralling out of control. Symptoms such as hopelessness, depression, isolation, fatigue, irritability, hypervigilance and insomnia may leave you feeling as though things will never be the same again. However, these are all normal reactions to an abnormal event and things can get better. I encourage you to attend to your symptoms as soon after the trauma as possible. Have compassion for yourself and allow your feelings to come and go. Try not to resist the feelings but rather let the waves of emotion roll through you and acknowledge that you are still ok once they’ve passed. This is a healthy part of your healing process. Also, know that you are not alone in your struggle. According to the National Center for PTSD, about 8% of all people will experience PTSD at some point in their lives. It may not feel like it at the moment but you are resilient and you can get through this. The following seven tips are a healthy start to your road to recovery:

EXERCISE

Studies have shown that exercise releases endorphins and, in turn, elevates your mood. Hit the gym, jog by the ocean, sign up for a yoga class, have a swim in the local pool, or simply go for a walk. No matter what your preference may be, try to get your body moving for at least 30 minutes each day.

EAT WELL AND GET PLENTY OF REST

Eat a balanced diet and get plenty of rest to help nourish and replenish your brain and body. If you are having trouble sleeping try to resist caffeine and alcohol. Trade coffee and caffeinated teas for herbal teas, listen to a calming audio book, and focus on relaxation and grounding techniques.

STAY CONNECTED

Although you may find yourself wanting to isolate from your friends and family, now is the time for connection. Find support from friends and family and minimize isolation. Connection helps you heal. Not to mention, laughter releases endorphins in your brain and can elevate your mood!

MAINTAIN A ROUTINE

Maintain a regular and positive routine. Take a bubble bath in the evening, read a good book, pursue a new hobby, or get out for a walk. Whatever it is that makes you feel good, make it part of your routine.

KEEP IT LIGHT

Minimize exposure to disturbing images or messages on the news or in books, TV programs, and movies.

AVOID SELF-MEDICATING

Alcohol, illicit drugs and prescription drug abuse are often used to numb symptoms of post-traumatic stress. Unfortunately, these only exacerbate the symptoms and may lead to the development of co-morbid, or co-occurring mental disorders. If you are struggling with substances you should let your doctor know so you can get the support you need.

SEEK HELP FROM A QUALIFIED THERAPIST

If your symptoms have prevented you from being able to go about your daily responsibilities and activities you may want to consider seeking the help of a qualified therapist. When treated thoroughly healing can lead not only to symptom reduction, but long-term transformation. It is extremely important to find a trauma therapist with whom you feel a sense of safety and comfort. You should be comfortable with the pace and work together towards your goals.

Wishing you a gentle journey,

Jennifer Brum

Filed Under: Trauma Recovery Tagged With: PTSD, recovery, symptoms, trauma

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